’ve been constipated all day long, on and off the toilet – pushing, squatting, rocking. Nothing is working! I don’t want to take a laxative or drink prune juice as that usually gives me diarrhea for days and I have lots of poop orders to fulfil! So, instead, in desperation, I roll a cigarette. Within minutes, this works to move my bowels and my asshole relaxes. I bend over, and out pours my streams and streams of my creamy, sloppy shit as I talk about how I wish someone was beneath me to catch my load in their mouth. I push, flex and wink my asshole until every last drop of shit is out. I feel MUCH better!!! If only there was someone to lick my asshole clean..

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